I Have Fallen
by britneyissolame
Summary: Nezumi x Shion Has anything really been told in a Seme's prospective? Nezumi is desperate to find shion, desperate to find that open window and hear that sharp cry once again.
1. Chapter 1

"I never thought I'd change my opinion again but you move me in a way that I've never know. You moved me in a way that I never know." Shake me break me, Savage garden

the mark of your soft lips still lies on mine.

I don't know what I feel about you Shion, am I in love?.

Am I denying ever thing?. I feel like I'm drowning in a sea of confusion, this is madness.

I search every night for that one open window but all are closed, where are you?.

I feel Shion's fair hot hand, burn the side of my ice cold neck. I know I am afraid of loving Shion, I never thought the boy who saved my life when I was child would be the person I lost.

I'm afraid, afraid that he may have fallen for someone else. Or even worse. . .I don't want to think about that. NO. He can't be. . . Dead. Can he?.

Every thing was my fault, I would have never lost him, I would have never let him slip out of hands if I hadn't left that day.

I was jealous of Safu part of me wanted to get ride of her because of the horrifying dreadful thought of letting her get close to Shion, I wanted to be the only one close to him. . . no body else. . .just Shion and I.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .I'm such an idiot, and idiot for falling in love with him.. . . . . but I loved being that idiot.

. . .I'm going to find you Shion, no madder lies ahead. I will find you, just. . . don't give up on me.

I . . . have fallen.

Ok, so um I wrote this because I loved No.6 and no one have every really written anything in the Seme's prospective it has always be the Uke of just third person. I'm not very skilled at writing in first person because I haven't really practiced first person in a while.

If people actually like this and are curious to find out what happens I think I'll continue this so comment favorite or follow if you want more. If not I'll just leave it like this as Nezumi's journal or something xD


	2. Chapter 2

***Strange/lazy sigh* I never really fully planned to continue this, part of me did but I wasn't so sure. I'm writing a Kuroshitsuji fanfiction write know and it's going to be pretty long but in between working on it I just decided to start this because. . .come on who can't resist the great Nezushi/ Nezumi x Shion? I'm not very skilled at first person (even though it's practically the same thing a third person . . .Translation: I'm lazy) I'm going to write this anyway because every thing was always told in Shion's prospective or the Uke's so I wanted to try writing in the Seme's xD and because I fucking love Nezushi / Nezumi x Shion xD **

**Disclaimer: I don't own No6 (if I did I would have added the. . .*smirk* scene in there *slides laptop away from parents view*)**

Before I began, I'd like to set a view things straight. First off, No6 and West block are rebuilt, No6 has there wall torn down but the security there is still high, sadly , West Block is still a dumb a complete wasteland. No6 is still to heartless to help this town up a bit, I feel like Shion was the only kind person that existed in the shit of a city.

Secondly. . . I love Shion and I've never been happier to know that his stupid friend is dead, I hope Shion never finds this. I sigh and nuzzle my chin into my palm imagining how angry Shion would be if he indeed did find it, I'm usually never this loving because it would only get In the way of my survival but even if he was angry he's just pull me in with that mesmerizing face of his I would never be able to stay angry at him.

Thirdly, I'm Nezumi and this is **my **story, I've fallen for Shion, I am an idiot for it but I love being that "Idiot."

After I toke a shower, brushed by teeth and pulled on my clothe I headed out into the ruins of West Block. My boots crunch a lot of shit and rubble, that day I kissed Shion I told him that he'd be fine but out conversation didn't end right there after I said that Shion said he'd leave his window open and scream my name for me every night but the problem here is that. . .I searched every where in No6 every night for that open window and kept my ears open for that sharp cry but I never found it.

My dreadful thoughts about this are:

Shion. . . died

Shion feel in love with somebody else and forgot about me, therefore, giving up on me.

Shion just completely forgot about the boy he saved that saved him in return.

I toke another large sorrowful sigh and stepped inside the ruins of Dog keeper's house "Keeper!," I yelled letting my echoes bounce off the walls only to summon the demons (Dogs) as I pulled out my pocket knife I heard a whistle bounce along with my shout.

Dog keeper casually strutted down the stairs making the pest's retreat "What do you want, here to find your boyfriend? Well he's not here," She snapped. It's months since the last time I seen Dog keeper about four months to be precise, the exact time when I lost Shion.

"Help me find him!."

She laughed and placed her hands on her hips pushing her body weight on one leg "Why, you're the idiot that let him slip out of your hands. . .?"

". . . B-Because," I held my breath.

"Say that you love him and I'll help you and bring along some friends but say it like you mean it!."

"Why?."

"Because it's so fucking obvious that you'd give up everything for Shion even your life! and I can't let you set off this journey without admitting it!."

I hated that bitch, she was so irritating and worthless. That day she told me I was jealous was the fist time she found out how I really felt, I'm soooo good at hiding my feelings aren't I? (That was ment to be sarcastic)

"I love Shion. I love him and only him!," I yelled meaning each and every one of those words, I blushed a little as the thought of Shion crossed my mind. I kept a stern face and waited for her annoying raspy voice "That'll do. . .SHIN!."

I though "Shin" was one of her Dog's or "Blanket" but I was wrong a boy with light brown hair and chest nut brown eyes walked shyly out of the room, he seemed to be the same age as Shion but I couldn't be sure, his fair face reminded me of Shion, thoughs gentle brown eye struck me immediately making my heart pound loudly creating a strange rythme.

"True?," Shin, the boys name meant true, it was so close to Shion's name it made me yearn for him even more giving me the confidence that I could actually find him.

"Yeah, he's my cousin. Looks a bit like Shion huh?," She said literally taunting me.

I studied the boys face a little longer "He doesn't look very strong." Shin frowned but didn't speak a word he just stood there examining me as if he had never seen a human being before, he listened to our conversation carefully.

"Looks can be deceiving. He doesn't talk much but he can help us with the journey a lot. Go help him back survival gear while I sharpen our weapons."

I forgot to mention, No6 was going to put up gates for one full week to gather the city for festival which means the city was going to have there guard on and every body was going to be there, including Shion he always loved to support anything he was apart of he was not going to miss this event. If we didn't find him it meant he was dead or moved to No3.

After I walked into Shin's room along with Shin himself Dog Keeper gathered weapons and went out side. We where taking a car a long the mountains but the gas was eventually going to run out so we needed to head a long by foot, therefore, we're an easy target for wild animals.

Shin pulled out a back pack from under his bead and stuffed it with a few things, leaving room for water and weapons, he seemed so shy and fragile by that I mean even by the tiniest insult it seemed as if he would burst out in tears.

"So. . .You're Dog Keepers cousin?," I asked trying to squeeze at least one word out of him but all he could manage was a shaky node.

"What are you skilled with?."

No answer.

"Knife?."

No answer.

"Bow?."

No answer.

"Gun."

He nodded shoving a pistol in his back pack along with amo. I smiled remembering Shion shot a guard whom shot me, it made me tear up a little but I shock them off. Shin's eyes looked so very familier

"You're eyes," I whispered un able to control my mouth! . . .god dammit.

His eyes lit up giving me a confused face expression "It's nothing. Let's go get out weapons."

We headed down stairs and gathered our weapons from Dog Keeper and headed out side , Shin still mysterious and as quiet as every.

Shin.

Shion.

**I'm kind of happy how this chapter turned out :/ leave a review about what you thought and if you want me to continue it ! xD**

**~review xD **


	3. Chapter 3

**I didn't write the other day I nearly had a heart attack, I literally can't go a day with out writing xD and I had this chapter stuck and planned out like the whole day yesterday, I'm never leaving my home again! xD My laptop doesn't really correct my mistakes because It's acting stupid but I try to catch my own by scanning through the whole chapter xD **

**Disclaimer: Like hell I wish I owned No6! xD **

I flinched as I felt his warm palm wrap around my neck I froze , completely. What was he doing? no, What was **I** doing just standing there letting him hit a presser point?. What was I doing? I knew if it had been somebody else I would have dodged the touch or slap his hand away but I didn't. Who was this person that made me keep my guard down , who are you? he looked into my eyes and trembled slightly as he whispered something I never heard anybody say to, well , me. "Nothing scares me more than the thought of loosing you," those words made me jump a little but still I didn't remove his hand, instead I let the heat of his palm warm my cool neck.

Who are you? who is this person who keeps my guard down and heart stop? Who are you. . .Shion?

"Nezumi!," He said. I don't remember him calling my name.

"Nezumi!," Dog keeper called clasping her hands together snapping me out of my day dream. Great, the bitch shaking me from my dreams, sometimes I just wish I could relive those moments with Shion over and over again and never wake from my sleep. I guess what I'm trying to say is my life is worthless if I don't have Shion beside me and if I can't do that I'm going to make it useful by finding him.

"Don't ever do that again!," I yelled snatching a pocket knife and a machete from her hands and shoving it into my back pack. "Why, having another sex fantasy with Shion." I glared at her trying my best from stopping my fist to meet her face "No," I said glancing over to Shin, I noticed something but I wasn't so sure if it was imagination or a displacement of my memory but I seen Shin blush a little after Dog Keeper said what she did.

"Well it's been four months don't you miss touching him?," His blush grew. I gave him a 'Why are you blushing, this is creepy,' face and looked back at the mess of a Dog Keeper. "I'm a virgin and so is Shion," I through my back pack over my shoulders and jumped into a ruined truck. The only reason I said what I did was because it was true, at least , I hope it was the truth and because I didn't want to go on this long car ride with her "Teasing."

I placed the car key into it's slot and twisted it , trying to start it up but all it did was rumble a bit then stop. "The batteries dead," I sighed.

"Well what do we do."

I glanced back at Shin "Shin you and I are going to push it, Dog Keeper while we do that once we reach the hill start the car and the battery should charge up." They both noded in agreement.

I stepped out of the truck letting Dog Keeper take my spot whilst that happened Shin and I walked to the end on the truck and pushed it, for his week figure, he was surprisingly. . .strong. Something about Shin made my heart stop but why? I only loved Shion. . . right? he caught me starring at his very creepily, I guess I did have my strange moments to.

He just. . .laughed. laughed. It was a very faint laugh but it was a familiar laugh. I needed to stop this, what if I was just hallucinating and imagining him making him take the place of Shion. No more question back to my job.

What I found strange about Shin is that to strips of his hair were covering the part of his cheek but I ignored it and viewed it as a little hair cut.

Once we shoved it down the hill and minutes after yelling and grunting Shin and I ran down the hill chasing the car and jumping into the trunk. Dog Keeper stopped and let us enter. Once I opened the door to the set next to the drivers set I seen a dog sit in my place. "What is this mutt doing here?"

"I brought him a long with us, you just have to sit in the back with Shin for now."

I sighed and calmly toke the set next to Shin. I slowly drifted off to sleep knowing very well that the car was soon going to run out gas and where going to have to travel along foot. Sigh. I failed to fall asleep when i felt a warm finger tap my shoulder. I grunted and turned my side only to see Shin smiling and removing his finger.

"What do you want?." He looked away as if saying he couldn't speak or refused to utter out a word, one of those.

"I see you don't talk much," He shock his head, Dog Keeper completely ignoring our , strange , I'm not sure if I could really call it "Conversation."

Instead of dealing with the hassle of talking to a mouthless child I pulled out a sheet of paper from my back pack along with a piece of paper.

Our notes went a little something like this:

Did you want something ?

-Nezumi

I wanted to ask you something

- Shin

And what was that?

-Nezumi

Do you love the person your looking for

-Shin

Of course, well , today was probably the first day I every told anybody that did but yes I do, why?

-Nezumi

He's closer than you think

-Shin

What do you mean by that?

-Nezumi

Even if you don't find the boy at No6 he is always with you, around you.

-Shin

What?

-Nezumi

He's always going to be in your heart I assume

-Shin

No because you'll be digging up my grave when we don't find him

-Nezumi

I through the paper on to the floor and pulled my hair back in frustration. What was this kid talking about? I shock of my worries like always and drifted away. Shin slowly kissed me, the feeling was the same a Shion's ,his lips the same pale peach , the dread of kissing anybody else besides Shion sickened me and I awoke with the rattling of the tuck.

"Jump!," I yelled, the car about to crash against a tree. Dog Keeper jumped out almost immediately leaving Shin to shake in fear "Keep ready to jump!."

He shock his head.

"What?," I wasn't going to let this fool die to easily so I wrapped my arms around him and jumped out of the car.

I felt as if everything was repeating.

What the fuck was happening?

**aHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I hate this chapter! it's horrible and i was way to anxious to continue my other fanfiction *rips hair out* I'm sorry! **

**~review xD **


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